So as I stood up late taking care of business, which is what most of us mommies do at night, I somehow got onto a very touchy subject with Symph. I seemed to mention something about mama getting older, and the tears, emotion, and questions became overwhelming. The word "older" is obviously not associated with anything good to her, and in fact means close to dying. She immediately began crying and asking me to please not get older, while I tried to explain that each year everyone gets older. This explanation made it even worse, and I began digging a much deeper hole when all I really wanted to do is calm her little mind of worries.
She wanted to know if I was going to have very soft skin and if it was going to be "squishy" and I told her I would, and oh, the sadness I saw in her little eyes. Immediately she started telling me she didn't want me to die, and asked who would take care of her when mama and papa were dead. Oh my, how in the world did I end up having this conversation with a little one so very late at night? I had to wake Dom up and have him try to explain to her since I was only making it worse. We prayed, and she cuddled with her papa and was fast asleep.